What to Do When You Don't Feel Qualified
Sitting in the crowded room, I felt myself shrinking as I took a step back to hide in the place the farthest back in the room. I felt so out of place among the professionals in the room. As I scanned the room, I noticed clusters forming naturally where people just started talking with each other. Not wanting to impose on the groups that were forming, I continued to hold back as I searched for a friendly face that made me feel welcomed.
Eventually, it was time to take our seats at the tables for the meeting to begin. I sat quietly at the table closest to me and nervously smiled at the person who sat next to me before turning my attention to the speaker.
The meeting was over in under an hour and I quickly grabbed my belongings and headed out of the door avoiding eye contact with those I passed by. In the safety of my car, I scolded myself for not being brave enough to at least try to meet someone new, after all, I joined the Chamber of Commerce to network.
I realized I didn't feel qualified to be in that room because I was an entrepreneur, and most of the other attendees were representatives from corporations. Having been negatively judged in the past for my decision to start my business, I was hesitant to share with these strangers what I did. Determined to not give up, I gave it another chance as I attended two more meetings, and even participated in an event.
What I found was this wasn't the organization for me. It left me feeling more discouraged and alone than before I started, and the amount of time needed to participate frequently was taking me away from valuable work. However, even though I came to this realization, I had come up with several ideas that could be incorporated into my quarterly conventions I was wanting to host within the Boldly Woven Ministry.
Had I not gone, I may not have had these ideas come up, nor would I have been wise enough to recognize I was needed elsewhere. Time is a valuable commodity and knowing when and where to focus first can be tricky. This can cause feelings of anxiousness as doubt begins to cloud your judgement and you question every decision you make. You question if you are even the right person for the task at hand and are certain there is someone better suited to do it instead.
What if your doubt is actually confirmation that you're walking into something holy?
Imposter syndrome is common. Especially among women, and even more so among creative women. It is important during moments of feeling like an imposter to remember who God says you are.
Have you ever stepped into a room, opened your laptop, or started a conversation and thought, "who am I do to this?"
Let's look at what imposter syndrome sounds like so we can recognize it quicker:
- I'm not smart enough
- Someone else could do this better
- I'm not as good as they think I am
- I should have more experience
When you have these thoughts - name it what it is: imposter syndrome.
Once you've named it, let's speak God's truth:
"Moses said to the Lord, "Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue." The Lord said to him, "Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say." Exodus 4:10-12
Let me remind you, you are not chosen because you are perfect. You are chosen because you are willing. If you feel incapable, ask God for wisdom. He will fill the gaps in your ability with His sufficiency.
Steps to take when you feel unqualified:
- Recognize the voice of fear. Not every thought is yours, or is true. Fear always makes it about you, while faith shifts the focus back to God. Look up 2 Timothy 1:7.
- Return to what God already said. Go back to the calling, the idea, or the moment you felt peace. Use scripture to anchor yourself in truth. Look up Isaiah 41:10.
- Respond in obedience, not confidence. Confidence may come later, but obedience can come now. Even small acts of obedience open the door to courage. Look up Joshua 1:9.
Chances are you've already overcome so many things. Things like seasons of waiting, fear, or rejection. Pause and reflect on what God has already walked you through.
Take one step forward this week. Do the things you've been afraid to do. After you've done this, pull out your journal and consider this question:
Where have I let fear decide I'm not enough and what does God say instead?
Always remember you are chosen.
With Grace, Shonda Ramsey
PS If you are stuck and in need of faith & lifestyle coaching, let's chat!